Mentally Strong People: The 13 Things They Avoid

BY AMY MORIN (Bible verses by Mark Cole) ~

Mentally strong people have healthy habits. They manage their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors in ways that set them up for success in life. Check out these things that mentally strong people don’t do, so that you too can become more mentally strong.

• For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. (2 Timothy 1:7 KJV)

1. They Don’t Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves

Mentally strong people don’t sit around feeling sorry about their circumstances or how others have treated them. Instead, they take responsibility for their role in life and understand that life isn’t always easy or fair.

• We know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them.  (Romans 8:28 NLT)

2. They Don’t Give Away Their Power To Other People

They don’t allow other people to control them, and they don’t give another person power over them. They don’t say things like, “My boss makes me feel bad,” because they understand that they are in control over their own emotions and they have a choice in how they respond.

• See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ. (Colossians 2:8)
• They promise them freedom, but they themselves are slaves of corruption. For whatever overcomes a person, to that he is enslaved. (II Peter 2:19 ESV)

3. They Don’t Shy Away from Change

Mentally strong people don’t try to avoid change. Instead, they welcome positive change and are willing to be flexible. They understand that change is inevitable and believe in their abilities to adapt.

• Intelligent people are always ready to learn. Their ears are open for knowledge. (Proverbs 18:15 NLT)

4. They Don’t Waste Energy on Things They Can’t Control

You won’t hear a mentally strong person complaining over lost luggage or traffic jams. Instead, they focus on what they can control in their lives. They recognize that sometimes, the only thing they can control is their attitude.

• You can’t control the weather, the stock market, or make the bad economy good.
• You can’t control people.  
• You can’t control the way they treat you.
• You can’t make someone love you or do right by you.
• You can’t run someone else’s life. You don’t have that kind of power! 
• You can’t prevent accidents from happening.  
• You can’t prevent your own death. 
• You can’t control God * (but you can trust Him). 

(*from ‘Biblical Keys to Mental, Emotional, and Spiritual Health’ by Dan White)

5. They Don’t Worry About Pleasing Everyone

Mentally strong people recognize that they don’t need to please everyone all the time. They’re not afraid to say no or speak up when necessary. They strive to be kind and fair, but can handle other people being upset if they didn’t make them happy.

• Paul ~ Even so we speak; not as pleasing men, but God, who tests our heart.                (1 Thessalonians 2:4)

6. They Don’t Fear Taking Calculated Risks

They don’t take reckless or foolish risks, but don’t mind taking calculated risks. Mentally strong people spend time weighing the risks and benefits before making a big decision, and they’re fully informed of the potential downsides before they take action.

• Jesus ~ But don’t begin until you count the cost. For who would begin construction of a building without first calculating the cost to see if there is enough money to finish it?  Otherwise, you might complete only the foundation before running out of money.(Luke 14:28-29 NLT)

7. They Don’t Dwell on the Past

Mentally strong people don’t waste time dwelling on the past and wishing things could be different. They acknowledge their past and can say what they’ve learned from it. However, they don’t constantly relive bad experiences or fantasize about the glory days. Instead, they live for the present and plan for the future.

• Paul ~ I am bringing all my energies to bear on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.  (Philippians 3:13-14 LB)

8. They Don’t Make the Same Mistakes Over and Over

Mentally strong people accept responsibility for their behavior and learn from their past mistakes. As a result, they don’t keep repeating those mistakes over and over. Instead, they move on and make better decisions in the future.

• Paul ~ Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace. (Romans 8:1-3, 6-7)

9. They Don’t Resent Other People’s Success

Mentally strong people can appreciate and celebrate other people’s success in life. They don’t grow jealous or feel cheated when others surpass them. Instead, they recognize that success comes with hard work, and they are willing to work hard for their own chance at success.

•  Rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep. (Romans 12:15 ESV)
•  Resentment kills a fool, and envy slays the simple. (Job 5:2)

10. They Don’t Give Up After the First Failure

Mentally strong people don’t view failure as a reason to give up. Instead, they use failure as an opportunity to grow and improve. They are willing to keep trying until they get it right.

• I was pushed back and about to fall, but the Lord helped me. The Lord is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation. (Psalm 118:13-14)
• The godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again. (Proverbs 24:16 NLT)

11. They Don’t Fear Alone Time

Mentally strong people can tolerate being alone and they don’t fear silence. They aren’t afraid to be alone with their thoughts and they can use downtime to be productive. They enjoy their own company and aren’t dependent on others for companionship and entertainment all the time but instead can be happy alone.

• Jesus got up very early in the morning, while it was still dark and went off to a solitary place where He prayed. (Mark 1:35 NLT)

12. They Don’t Feel the World Owes Them Anything

Mentally strong people don’t feel entitled to things in life. They weren’t born with a mentality that others would take care of them or that the world must give them something. Instead, they look for opportunities based on their own merits.

• If a man will not work, he shall not eat. (2 Thessalonians 3:10)
• Good planning and hard work lead to prosperity, but hasty shortcuts lead to poverty. (Proverbs 21:5 NLT)

13. They Don’t Expect Immediate Results

Whether they are working on improving their health or getting a new business off the ground, mentally strong people don’t expect immediate results. Instead, they apply their skills and time to the best of their ability and understand that real change takes time.

• Paul ~ Suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. (Romans 5:3-5).
• Solomon ~ Wealth from get-rich-quick schemes quickly disappears; wealth from hard work grows over time. (Proverbs 13:11 NLT)

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